Thursday, December 10, 2009


fam-i-ly  /[fam-uh-lee, fam-lee] noun, plural -lies, adjective
1. parents and their children, considered as a group, whether dwelling together or not.
2. the children of one person or one couple collectively: We want a large family.
3. the spouse and children of one person: We're taking the family on vacation next week.
4. any group of persons closely related by blood, as parents, children, uncles, aunts, and cousins: to marry into a socially prominent family.
5. all those persons considered as descendants of a common progenitor.

Last night Audrey came over to get her haircut. Alyssa, Dad, and Zach were playing Rockband. Nikki was studying/doing homework. Mom and I were crocheting. She looked at us and said, "This is what a family looks like."
And I started thinking of everything we've been through, to get where we are now.
I had a hatred for my family that was completely unimaginable. I hated my Mom, because she was always worried about me. When she voiced her worries, they were so dead on, I would immediately try to defend myself. I hated my Dad because he didn't care about anything but his stupid video games. I hated Alyssa because she was always too good for me, and never made time for me. I hated Nikki because she was so goody-two-shoes, no one cared. I hated Zach because he was so little, and didn't know the things I was going through. I would come home to fighting, screaming, crying, anything but smiles and happiness. Everything with us was wrong. Completely wrong.
That's why when Audrey came in and said that, my heart stopped for about a minute.
We have been through SO much. My parents had issues, we had our own issues, and no one could do anything about it. We didn't know what to do, or how to do it. So we all went our separate ways, and pretended that we were comfortable being with each other. We would sit down for dinner, and pretend that we were a functional, happy family.
And then it all changed.
We started going back to church, and us kids fought it until we were blue in the face. My parents started fixing their marriage. Once that happened, they started fixing us. We fought and fought and fought.
But soon, Alyssa turned her life around, and found God. I turned my life around, found God.
Notice, everything starts changing with God. God. God. God.
We did not fix us. God did. We all found Him, and He allowed us to find love for each other. He allowed us to be with each other. He allowed us to smile and laugh and be a family.
So when Audrey came in, and saw that we were a real family, my heart exploded. She saw that we were together, she saw that we were happy.
I'm in love with my family.
Thanks, God.


augustine said...

God breaths life where there is none. thank you for being real!

Anonymous said...

so awesome

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